narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via johnathanocallaghan)

poupon:

drakensberg:

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

how dare you say we piss on the poor

(via death-by-lulz)

Norse Mythology

  • Everyone: LOKI NO
  • Loki: LOKI YES
  • *later*
  • Loki: Okay yeah, Loki no.

avengers: age of ultron spoilers

  • steve: shield is gone...
  • everyone: ...
  • clint: what do you mean shield is gone??? where did it go???

relahvant:

when i make a joke to myself and no one’s around to hear it

image

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(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

vaginawoolf:

coolator:

i wanna be one of those people who does yoga at sunrise and drinks water out of mason jars filled with berries and twigs and shit

 

(via windondowntheroad)